Update – unload
As usual, I have a lot going on, mostly a lot in the works. I am working on a small painting of a small cat, for a friend of mine, actually a return customer, I did a painting for her of another one of her cats a few years ago. I need to find a photo and add to my website. I am wanting to update my website, I may just move it all over here to wordpress, better pricing. I have had my website in one form or another since 1999, about the same year my husband was diagnosed with Parkinson’s. I have never been very active in trying to sell my work, I have just given it all away for the most part. I have said this countless times before, and I have faith it will happen someday, but there will be a time that I need to be able to work from home to provide better care for him as his Parkinson’s advances. So painting would be one method of income – so I need to learn how to sell. Since my artistic style is basically realistic, loosely based on reality I like to say, I could also do murals. I have always wanted to paint on walls. When I was a teenager I painted a 6 ft bird behind my bedroom door and a giant white dove on the wall by my bed.
I am also developing an interest in memoir writing. I am starting with my husband’s and perhaps my Mom. My mother and my husband are excellent writers/story tellers in their own right. So perhaps just encouraging them is what I do. But it fits with the portrait painting I do. A memoir is simply a written portrait of a life. I have contacted a person in this field, there is an association, and several available mentors…so that is definitely a thought for the future. Oh and cookies, I havent made any iced cookies lately but decorative sweets are always on my list of things to create and perhaps sell.
I am also trying to get our house back in shape, in the event we do have to sell it. Home sales in the area where we live have not been as bleak as in other areas, but there have been several houses close by that have sat on the market for well over a year. We have had so many expenses lately that we can’t afford to do much. I have been doing our lawn maintenance, if you can call it that. Manicured is not the word I would use to describe our lawn, nor my fingers or my toes needless to say. I use an old rotary mower and/or a weed eater to cut our grass-like substances. I’ve trimmed our hedges, cut limbs from trees, planted flowers, etc…But I still need to clean the gutters, and do several others things which involve ladders. We are going to have our house cleaned tomorrow. YAY! I’ve been saying that for the past year. One it gets a big Kahuna cleaning, maybe we can keep up with it better. It is depressing to have to face a dirty house after working all day.
I have been looking Parkinson’s/disability/caregiver support groups, etc. for a long time, and I have talked some people and found one I will contact. For the most part the support groups I have found don’t seem to fit us… the one at church for example is for mothers of disabled children, and for giving away medical equipment and supplies such as wheelchairs. A lovely lady at church gave us a transport wheel chair by the way and we are very grateful. Parkinson’s caregiver support groups are during the day as are most the groups or activities for Parkinson’s people and their family. Working fulltime and already taking off work a lot to just get him to his multitude of appointments, the day time support stuff for me just hasn’t worked out. I have found several “resource” books I’d like to get, and then actually read. I have talked to some people at church and there are some resources there perhaps but our needs aren’t even yet clearly defined… our need for help is still evolving.
My day job is going ok. Easter through Memorial Day is a very busy time though, and now getting ready for the 4th July. July and August and January are our slow months. My new boss has been understanding of my situation with my husband which has been a blessing. Many days I have to leave work to take Him to a PT or Dr appointment. It is a strain going back and forth. I have been trying to find somebody he would let take him. He drives himself sometimes, but the infection he has several weeks ago, set him back quite a bit. Also the PT and OT like me to be there with him so I can learn the exercises and help supervise him doing, them. I can see improvement in Him’s movement though and he says he feels better over all. Hopefully we will get into a routine of doing them at home, or perhaps at the gym at my church at some point. It would be so much better if I could stay home with him, but financially that is not possible right now. We needed to replace our a/c earlier this month and couldn’t afford to pay cash for it…cant get a loan without a job. I am doing work for my day job from home today and I better get started soon on that or I won’t finish, and we have a one o’clock PT appt today - which will cost me 2 hours.
I still read at Mass when scheduled, for the 6:30 a.m. mass, 9 am Saturday morning Mass and for the big weekend Mass. I read about once a week at 6:30, every other Saturday at 9 a.m. and at big Mass about every six weeks – however the schedule that is given me falls. I also am still doing the Jail Ministry every other weekend. We do a communion service at one of 4 locations (which we rotate one week one place, the next another) in the ladies side of the county jail. I had laid off for a while but we are short of volunteers so I was asked to come back so I did. I love it. The communion service includes a brief reflection on the readings and then we just sit and talk about Jesus and how the Holy Spirit works in our lives. We sing a lot too. It is great.
I have a lot of poems in my heart I just haven’t been able to get them on paper, and when I do…they seem so simple, mediocre …I suppose that is what my heart is craving for itself..simple…feeling mediocre hurts it though. I have been writing in my live scribe journal and keep audio journal with my live scribe pen I love it. I still have the books I want to write. One ficition, one screenplay and one spritiual guide type of poetic thing (still working out the details). So many unfinished symphonies.
I’ve been squeezing in exercise when I take him to the PT, I will walk around the hospital grounds – it is a hilly walk – not just flat like around here, there are some stairs to be included for extra umph, and a nice trail with a duck pond and bridge, some pretty landscaping – it is actually a very nice walk and I feel the soreness in my legs afterwards. I need to start getting up early again, but I seem to be nursing a little bit of depression. Everybody tells me I need to take care of myself and I know this. What good will I be to him or anybody if I get sick or whatever….fall apart. My prayer life is still deep even though I haven’t had time to do much dedicated meditation. A friend of mine suggested that I offer everything I do for my husband as prayer to God – so I try to keep this in my heart, good thing God and my husband have a sense of humor. My thoughts and heart is constantly with my God who gives me tremendous response one way or another, if not comfort which I feel particularly the quiet time in the mornings just after I wake up and before I get out of bed. Makes me just want to stay there.
More later love, Lu.
